• It is ALWAYS possible to park directly in front of any building you are visiting.

• A detective can only solve a case once he or she has been suspended from duty.

• If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

• Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

• It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts because your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out each of their predecessors.

• You need not be concerned about being knocked unconscious by a blow to the head as you will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.

• No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

• Police departments give each of their officers a personality test to make sure they are deliberately assigned to a partner who is their exact opposite.

• When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak to each other in English.

• You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

• Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it’s the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

• An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.

AND FINALLY

• Television news bulletins always contain a lead story that affects you personally at the precise moment you turn on the television!

The preceding was provided as a risk management service, as a little humor can go a long way in reducing stress.