Internet Intelligence?

• Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
• If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you even tried.
• A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
• If peanut butter cookies are made from peanut butter, then what is Rocky Road ice cream made out of?
• If space is a vacuum, who changes the bag?
• If swimming is good for your shape, then why are all the whales so fat?
• Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool?
• How do you get off a non-stop flight?
• How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
• If a jogger could run at the speed of sound could he still hear his Walkman?
• If athletes get athlete’s foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?
• If tin whistles are made of tin what are fog horns made of?
• If you jog backwards will you gain weight?
• Why is that time of day with the slowest traffic called “rush” hour?
• Experience is something you never get until just after you need it.
• For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
• No one is listening until you make a mistake.
• Why do the signs that say “Slow Children” have a picture of a running child?
• Why do they call it “chili” if it’s hot?

AND FINALLY

• Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!

The preceding was provided as a risk management service, as a little humor can go a long way in reducing stress.